1991 Friendship with a Man

How do I want it? Let me share the ways.
I want the comfort I'd have with a loving mother,
The aliveness I feel with a you-can-say-it-all friend,
The stimulation of a trip with a fellow adventurer,
The quietude of a peaceful walk in the forest,
The openness of a scientist with her experiment,
The compassion of a nurse with a patient in pain,
The easy reassurance of a coach to a boy who missed a ball,
The physical closeness of a baby at the breast,
The sigh of fullness at completing a poignant story,
The clapping hands and jumping feet of a child invited overnight,
The shy smile the first day of school with a new friend,
The hope, blessed, eternal hope,
That this man's shock absorbers
Can keep smooth any ride we take.

I'm ready! Are you?

The Day She Chose to Die

She's taking the pills and thus her pain will end.
She's thought it out thoroughly,
Has received notes of love from friends in her building.

What freedom and lightness to be able to be so clear about completing her life.
That takes more trust in the unknown than I might have
Even filled with pain.

When I sit quietly opposite my friend, who's just visited her,
It doesn't matter that I don't know her friend.
I feel expansive enough to be in the shoes of Presence,
Walking towards Peace with this woman I haven't met.

My friend and I made biscotti today,
An endeavor I'd not have done on my own.
She shared some with her dying friend,
Whose appreciation gave me a minor role in this life-death drama.

I am grateful for biscotti that I can also freeze and enjoy later,
For sharing creative time with my friend,
And for the link today that encircled me in the strong chain of connection.
May she now, and we when our time is ripe, rest in peace.

What We Shared Over Breakfast Feb. 2011

The gold lamp suspended above lights up this Subway
Where we got our 2-for-1 breakfast sandwich.
I got to be the little girl clapping inside at this free morning meal.
And now my heart is singing harmony with my inaudible clapping.
I bet the music could have accompanied Genesis' singing this morning.

And here at the table when we had our fill, my friend offered me a trip
Late May to Arizona and three national parks.
She's one of the easiest persons I've ever met to feel at home with.
Soon we'll walk to the bus and I'll show her the route from Burien to West Seattle.

Talking to her is like opening the cookie jar and
Having a leisurely cup of coffee or tea.
She indulges my love of variety and new experiences.
And even this 2-for-1 breakfast and anticipation of our trip
And the vitality of the church music and the large and welcoming congregation
Fill me. I'll go home and listen to bluegrass and the day will be complete.

A Trip to the Tulip Festival at Mt. Vernon

Mountains with patchwork snow,
Trees with scattered blooms,
Families at picnic tables with popcorn and drinks and picnic lunches.
Paths of red and yellow, orange and purple tulips
A windmill surrounded by every color tulips come in.
Tales of past adventures coming from nearby tables,
Tents offering burgers, hot dogs, flannel cakes, ice cream.
Tulip plants and grass vases (!) for sale in the big tent.

Benches for viewing private auditions of a tulip performance.
My three friends and I at this table sharing fudge, chips and stories.
And the sun is out. What a day! And we're still on the move!

We drive by more tulip fields, and stop at Farmhouse Restaurant for a lunch buffet.
Then a jaunt to Padilla Bay estuary, and the nearby visitors center
Where we're welcomed to the exhibits, even though they're closed on Tues.
We watch and read about sea life and birds,
And I hit the button five times for the sound of ducks,
That brings me at warp speed to every duck pond I've ever stopped at.

Now we're driving up to Mt. Erie, with its views of valleys and mountains and farms.
On the drive coming and going,
We discuss Byron Katie's www.thework.com and A Course in Miracles.
Gratitude and hugs are shared for this perfect day.
Our friendship is even deeper. Life is good.

You're Leaving--To a Housemate of Seven Years 3-9-2011

Chris, you've been a housemate for seven years.
And you were the only one in 26 years I didn't meet before you moved in.

I will miss your hugs, your grins and laughter,
Our mutual teasing, playing with words and ideas,
Shaking our heads about a common friend.
Our shared appreciation for Abraham Hicks, the Law of Attraction
And the Focus Wheel for my relating to a difficult friendship.

I see a parallel to your moving with the death of my friend Charles.
Knowing he was dying, I visited him every two or three weeks.
On the day he died, I went and sat with his body for two hours
And wrote thoughts and fees as I absorbed the finality of our friendship.
That night, nine of us shared stories and tears and memories.
I'll always remember how complete I felt that night.

Having time to "take in" the fact of your leaving
Has made this transition easier.
I feel a numbness and a sadness, a wistfulness and a heaviness
AND I am so glad you chose what your heart said "yes" to.

I'm grateful we both are staying aware of what lessons might be there
By way of our connection with a complex mutual friendship.

It was lovely to see how you and my brotherAllan connected.
Our potluck discussion took you in warmly when you joined us.
The small Christmas tree in the hall brought back the days
When I loved to decorate the tree with my kids for Christmas.
It was a joy to see and contribute what collected under the tree those weeks.

I'm tickled that we can giggle at those earlier times
When your temper surprised and even shocked me.

I value your generosity: the Saeco hot water pot, the microwave,
Rearranging the basement with James, sharing your Vortex DVDs.
And I was so thrilled when we worked on GMoneyPro affiliate marketing
Until we both got discouraged by puzzling messages of not "following policies."

My experience of Friendship has broadened these seven years.
You have become a Forever Friend, one who'd be on my Christmas list
(If I sent out Christmas cards), one whose birthday I hope to remember.
We've both grown in tolerance and acceptance of different housemates' behaviors.
I've loved seeing the closeness you and Ashley have with each other.

And the little things--your bringing matches for bathroom odors,
Doing the vacuuming every week, fixing it when it needed parts,
Putting Easter egg candies outside each of our bedroom doors,
Even hauling MY boxes to the basement as you cleared out yours for the move.

I'm sure I've overlooked some shared adventures or conversations,
But our friendship is a sculpture, a Friendship Oscar, that will take its place alongside
My leaves, frogs, ducks, dried bouquets, and boxes of "treasures."
There will always be a place in my heart and my home for you, my friend Chris.

Love, affection, and openness, Moreah